Posted in Abusive Relationships, Marriage, Relationships, Stay at Home Wife

Continuing to “cut” a bad relationship out of my life…

The man that I dated long distance for almost a year really likes long hair. I had extremely long hair when I started dating him and decided at some point during our relationship that I couldn’t cut my hair until he had a chance to come out and visit me so he could see it in person. Not once during that year did he come out to see me though, and so my hair just continued to get longer and longer and more of a hassle to care for. I held off on cutting my hair even after I broke it off with him though because part of me wanted to see just how long I could grow it out even though my long hair had become an unwanted reminder of him and our failed relationship.

I finally had enough a couple of days ago though and informed my husband as he was getting up for the day that he was going to have to cut my hair for me soon before I did something drastic. Like taking some scissors to it myself. Or something really drastic, like taking the clippers to it and cutting it all off. He said he’d help me out and he went off to work and I went off to sleep. When he came home later that day he made good on his promise to help me out.

Here’s how long my hair got.

3-10-2014 Haircut Before (Edited)

Once we figured out about how long I wanted it to be he started cutting. I was standing next to a mirror, but could not see without turning my head. And I wasn’t about to turn my head (or move at all if I could help it) while my husband was cutting my hair, because the last thing I wanted to hear him say was “oops”. It became very clear from the surge of anxiety I felt when I heard him cutting the first few locks off that taking the clippers to it would have been a horribly bad idea. The sound of the scissors cutting through my hair and then the sound of the hair falling into the waste basket was more nerve wracking than I expected it to be. But at the same time it was freeing. And as more and more hair got cut off I felt less and less anxious and more happy to be moving on with my life in yet another way.

Here is the result immediately after he was done cutting my hair. I hadn’t even seen it yet.

3-10-2014 Haircut After (Edited)

Here a few more photos after my hair had dried some.

3-10-2014 Haircut After Dry 1 (edited)3-10-2014 Haircut After Dry 3 (Edited)3-10-2014 Haircut After Dry 2 (Edited)

It felt so short. I posted pictures on Facebook and my friends reminded me that my hair was still really long. Which it is, but it’s going to take a while to get used to it being about 15 or so inches shorter than it used to be.

3-10-2014 Haircut (edited) 13-10-2014 Haircut (edited) 23-10-2014 Haircut (edited) 8

But even though it feels really short to me now, I am still super happy with it. I’m really enjoying it not always being in the way.

And I’m glad to have “cut” another reminder of a bad relationship out of my life.

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8 thoughts on “Continuing to “cut” a bad relationship out of my life…

  1. I had no idea it had gotten that long! You have beautiful hair 🙂

    Well, you already know how I handled a similar situation. Since I am trying to grow it out I just dyed the heck out of it.

    Here’s to change that we want! 🙂

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    1. Thank you. 🙂

      I was tempted to cut almost all of it off and dye what was left purple, so… 😉 I think I made the right choice in not cutting it all off though, but I think I might go ahead and put another purple streak in my hair soon.

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  2. Wow, 15 inches. My hair is about the same color as yours and at the bottom, mine is lighter like yours was at the ends. I actually want mine to be the length yours was before the cut, it takes a long time to grow. The fact that your husband was the man doing the cutting now removes any vestige of your hair being for a failed relationship. You let go of a bad relationship, so you could find a good one, yay! The beautiful hair you have now is for your husband 🙂
    I like that your husband cuts your hair. My guy trims mine and it is something I never did before him, but now I cannot imagine letting anyone else cut my hair. You have beautiful hair, you should ask your husband to braid it for you. When mine is braided I can see the natural red on the top layers offset with the darker layers, with no coloring required. 🙂

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    1. I’ve been married to my husband for over 11 years now, so I already had a good relationship at the same time that I had the bad one. The relationship that just recently ended was a polyamorous one. (Meaning my husband was aware of and okay with the relationship from the very beginning.) But now that the bad one is gone, I can more fully focus on the good one that I’ve had all along. That’s not to say that I won’t ever end up in another polyamorous relationship if that’s what life decides to throw at me again, I have nothing against polyamory. For right now though, I’m happy to have my husband as the only significant other in my life. 🙂
      I do braid my own hair sometimes. My husband might be good at cutting my hair for me, but braiding it not so much. 😉 I don’t do it very often because I used to wear my hair in a braid ALL the time the last time that I grew it out really long a few years back. And as far as the color, my hair was wet in the picture of it before it was cut, so that’s why it looks lighter at the bottom.
      I just don’t see any point in paying anyone else to cut my hair when all I want is a simple cut. A lot of women think I’m crazy to ask my husband to do it though. 😉
      Good luck on your attempts to grow your hair out. 🙂

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      1. I am making progress. My guy was my sanity check on Tuesday. With the dry air in my apartment and at work, I was getting a lot of tangles and it really bugged me. My coworker said I had dried out ends and needed to cut a good 4-5 inches off, eek! That is a good 8-10 months of growth! So I told my boyfriend I needed it cut. He told me to not get excited or ask for anything crazy. Well my guy picked up some argan oil for me and told me to try it on my ends and wait until the weekend before I ask him to cut my hair. Well the oil worked great, my hair feels so soft without the tangles. So no haircut this weekend. I am thinking about some hair color though 😉

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