Today my anxiety has taken control. I have felt this close to a panic attack since waking up this morning.
Next weekend we will be going down to the apartment complex that we are wanting to move into and will hopefully be filling out rental applications and putting a hold on an apartment. I called the office last weekend just to get an idea of availability right now, because if they don’t really have anything available for October or November our chances for getting into an apartment in December when our lease is up wouldn’t be all that great. They do currently have some apartments to choose from for November though and hopefully by this weekend will start to have information about availability in December. We plan on trying to move in December if possible, but if when we go down there this weekend they do not have any apartments available in December we will put a hold on an apartment available in November just to be sure of having somewhere to move to. I asked the management at the apartment complex if we could transfer our hold to another apartment should one become available to move into in December and was told that we could, so if we aren’t able to put a hold on an apartment that would be available in December this weekend we will check back with them a week later and transfer our hold if one becomes available. If none are available by then we’ll probably just commit to moving in November and start focusing on making that happen. It wouldn’t be ideal, there will be many more fees from our current complex, but we need to move this year and we’re going to do what we need to, to make that happen. And while I know that there is absolutely nothing that I can do about any of this until this weekend, that doesn’t stop my brain from worrying about it.
I also have a couple of dentist appointments coming up in October, one to finish up the work that needs to be done and one later on in the month to check on the healing progress of my mouth. And I’m not all that worried about having to go to the dentist, but having appointments at all is stressing me out.
I called my doctor’s office yesterday to finally set up that follow-up appointment that my doctor wanted with me because of my high blood pressure. That is also at the end of October. And I’m worried that the stress of trying to move will mess with my readings. I also have no idea exactly what my doctor plans on doing during this appointment or how much it’s going to end up costing me. Or how many other appointments she’s going to want to set with me after this one, and how much all of those are going to cost me. Not to mention the fact that I will be getting to this appointment on my own because Curtis has to work. I hate taking Trax by myself. Luckily it’s very unlikely that I will end up getting lost while walking there from the train station, I just need to walk to the main road and walk in the correct direction and I’ll be able to easily find it.
I did manage to get a lot of cleaning and housework done today though, so there’s that. Though, I should probably go and switch over the loads of sheets in my washer and dryer now…