Posted in Apartment Living

Sorry our intent to vacate paperwork ruined your plans to raise our rent…

Curtis and I filled out and handed in our official “Intent To Vacate” paperwork over two weeks ago. We insisted on getting a copy of this paperwork that was signed and dated by apartment management. We even had a conversation with management about how we were already aware that we would need to pay rent for the entire month of December, and not just the days that we will actually still be living here, because our lease doesn’t end until December 31.

The office should have been clear on the fact that we are not planning on renewing our lease.

On Saturday we found a notice stuck in the clip outside of our front door. It reminded us that our lease was going to be ending on December 31 and told us that they hoped that we are enjoying living in the complex and would choose to renew our lease. It also informed us that if we did decide to renew our lease our rent would be increasing by $110 a month ­čÖé .

The smiley face was an actual part of the sentence on the notice.


We immediately called the office and reminded them that we already handed in our intent to vacate paperwork over two weeks ago and made sure that they hadn’t lost it. They confirmed that they still had the paperwork and we ended that phone call. Soon after they called us back and left a confusing message that brought up the fact that our lease wasn’t up until December 31 for reasons we couldn’t understand. So we tried to call them back for clarification as we were instructed to in the message and were unable to reach anyone. We then walked over to the office and asked them in person to please clarify the message that they left us. Apparently, they were once again making sure that we knew that we would have to pay for the entire month of December. We reminded them that we already had this conversation and went home to continue packing.

Thanks for wasting my time

We are glad that our apartment complex was happy about the prospect of getting $110 more a month from us, but had they just consulted their records they would have seen that we had already declined to do so over two weeks earlier when we handed in that intent to vacate paperwork.

You know, the paperwork that clearly states that we will not be renewing our lease and therefore will not be giving them $110 more each month.


Thanks again apartment complex for wasting all of our time this weekend and causing unnecessary stress by not bothering to consult your records before sending out notices.

Oh, and by the way, what the hell are you smiling about? Informing someone that you are planning on raising their rent by $110 a month is not a situation in which you should use a smiley face. Raising someone’s rent by that much in one year is not a happy thing.

At least it’s not a happy thing for the resident who will have to pay it. You may find it to be a happy thing, but perhaps you shouldn’t advertise that you enjoy raising the rent on your residents. Greedy is not a flattering look.

Posted in Apartment Living

It’s finally officially official, sort of…

We finally got word yesterday from the apartment complex we will be moving to in less than two months that our applications have officially been approved. Only they still need to speak with Curtis’ supervisor and could Curtis please expedite that phone call?

Hang up and text

Curtis had already talked to his supervisor earlier before he got the message from the apartment complex and his supervisor was waiting to get some answers back from HR on what information he was and was not allowed to give out. Such as salary information, which should already be covered by the payslips that were given to the apartment complex when we filled out our applications anyway.

So, they still have to talk to Curtis’ supervisor, but apparently they decided that this process had been strung out long enough already and went ahead and approved us. They probably took the fact that we’ve been bugging them to please finish verifying the rest of the information on our applications as a sign that we probably didn’t falsify any of it. Because if we had, I doubt we’d be pushing for them to please catch us in our lies as quick as possible.

So now that we’ve been approved I can stop worrying that they are going to tell us that the amount needed in order to move in has increased because they now need an increased security deposit from us. Which is good, because I have no idea where we would have gotten the money had they required more from us.

Money can't buy happiness

Now my main worry is that we are going to have a repeat of what happened the last couple times we moved and we are soon going to be told that the apartment that we are planning to move into will not in fact be available. Leading to the nightmare of either just going with whichever one bedroom apartment they happen to have available whether we like the location or not, or being told that they do not have any one bedroom apartments available for us anymore. An apartment complex running out of apartments, and then sticking us in a more expensive floor plan, is the reason why we are moving again after only living in our current complex for a couple of years. That and the inefficiency of our current space and the fact that the complex is going downhill.

We’d really like to be able to just move into the type of apartment we want in the location in the property that we chose and therefore greatly decrease the likelihood of having to move again soon.

We are so very tired of moving.

Go Minimal

Posted in Apartment Living

My colors have been packed away…

The walls of my townhouse are now a bare, boring white decorated only by the holes in them where my things once hung. All of the colorful things that I had covering them were packed away over the weekend. All of my decorative items were carefully wrapped and stored in boxes to await our move in a little under two months.

I’m glad to have gotten started on the packing. Doing it slowly over the next couple months will help us avoid a thousand trips up and down our stairs the weekend before our move and make it all much more manageable.

This round of packing was fairly quick and easy. Much easier than it’s been in the past. Already I’m noticing the difference that donating most of our stuff has made. I’m hoping this is an indication of how the rest of our packing and move will go.

I’m happy we’ve started, but two months seems a long time to have to stare at ugly white walls.

Great Idea until packing

Posted in Apartment Living, Random

I’ve started to have nightmares about our move…

As anyone who regularly reads this blog or is friends with me on Facebook is probably aware, I am just a little stressed about our upcoming move.

Great Idea until packing

This was further evidenced by the nightmare I had last night. In it, Curtis and I were signing paperwork required for our move, but for some reason we were doing this in a model apartment. During the course of signing the paperwork the rental agent had us take another tour of the model apartment. When we got to the walk-in closet in the bedroom we were shocked to discover that they had converted the closet into some sort of closet/bathroom combination. There were still some rods to hang stuff up on, but most of the closet space was now taken up by a shower. There was also this tiny little metal sink with built-in toothbrush holders sticking out of the wall. The rental agent was really proud of it and kept calling a second bathroom. We were pissed and inquired if all of the apartments had already had this renovation done. She said that most had, but she couldn’t remember if the one that we were moving into had. So we asked to look at the apartment that we were moving into and discovered that not only had this renovation been done, but about half the floor of the closet bathroom was missing. I remember wondering if it was too late to decide to move to another apartment complex and then the dream ended.


I texted Curtis to tell him about my dream and remind him to make sure to contact the apartment complex before they closed today because this was the day that we were told they should have a final answer on our rental applications.

Only when Curtis did get in touch with someone we were told that they are still working on verifying employment and rental history and should have everything back by Wednesday. Apparently one of the phone numbers on the paperwork was incorrect, so now that’s been corrected they should be able to finish verifying. Why they didn’t ask if the numbers were correct the last time that we talked to them I will never understand. We at least did find out that they do wait to take the money from our account until everything has been finalized.

Curtis did not verify that they have not turned all their walk-in closets into closet bathrooms though.

Posted in Health

My doctors office has lost my trust…

I went to the doctor for what was supposed to be all preventative care a couple of months ago. I wasn’t sure how I felt about my actual doctor that day. My first impression/gut feeling was that she didn’t seem very friendly and seemed to be judgmental. She seemed impatient. She asked me about my weight but didn’t say a thing to my husband about his. (he’s really skinny and always has been.)

I was even less impressed when we found out that we would have to return the next day (not easy without a car) for blood tests because no one told us to fast for the appointment. And when we returned the next day the order for my blood work wasn’t even in the system. I was able to get the blood work done that day, but that was another point in the negative column for them.

I then got a bill for some of the services performed at that preventative care visit. There were things that were not coded as preventative so my insurance wouldn’t cover them. I talked to all the people who I was supposed to in order to get it fixed and thought that I had.

Only, early this morning I got a notification letting me know that I am still being billed for it.


The only reason I went to that doctor’s appointment in the first place was because it wasn’t supposed to cost me anything. But now I’m stuck with a bill that I have to try to figure out how to pay. Which will be harder than I first thought because it looks like they don’t accept the form of payment that I was planning on using.

I had a followup appointment scheduled for next week that I just cancelled today. I can’t afford to pay what I already owe them, so I’m not about to add to it. The appointment was for my blood pressure, which has been much lower lately anyway (even with all the stress in my life), so I’m not all that worried about it.

I shouldn’t have to cancel appointments because I can’t afford to pay for them, even with insurance. This is not how healthcare should work…

Posted in Apartment Living

Two months from today…

Exactly two months from today Curtis and I will be signing our new lease and officially starting our move in process. We have truck rented for the next day to move our stuff into the new apartment. It still remains to be seen if we will be doing this move completely on our own or if we will be able to get help from some Curtis’ coworkers. Since we will be moving in the middle of December on a Tuesday I am not holding out hope for much help. I would obviously prefer if we could get some help with our move, but since we have recently dramatically reduced the amount of stuff that we own I am confident that Curtis and I will be able to handle this move on our own if need be. We’ve done moves all by ourselves when we owned far more stuff, after all. And this time we plan on having as much stuff as we possibly can staged in our garage, so there will be a bare minimum of stairs that we will have to deal with since we will be moving it straight from the garage to the truck and then from the truck to our ground floor apartment. It will not be fun having to move our washer & dryer set down the stairs of our townhouse that day though.

Moving Rule #31

Our garage is one step closer to being ready for all our stuff to be staged in it since one of Curtis’ coworkers stopped by last night and took away more than half of the huge donation pile that we had. She plans on stopping by for the rest of it next week probably. Soon we’ll start boxing up all of our decorative items and moving them down to the garage. We hope to slowly move all of our stuff downstairs to the garage over the course of the next 2 months and avoid spending the days immediately before the move walking up and down our stairs.

So, in two months we’ll be starting our moving process, but we still have not gotten official confirmation that our applications were accepted, nor have they deducted the money to hold the apartment and pay the application fees from our bank account. I’m hoping that they have a policy of waiting until they know for sure that someone has been approved before they charge someone’s account and that they will take their money in the next couple days and let us know that we’ve been approved. Not knowing exactly why the money is still sitting in our account makes me anxious though.

Posted in Apartment Living, Family, Marriage

Last weekend’s mantra: it’s all just stuff…

This past weekend Curtis and I went through every item that we own.

Every. Single. Item.

Why Do I Own All Of The Things

We spent the entire weekend going through it all and deciding what we were keeping, what we were donating and what was trash. Our rule was if we aren’t actually using it or going to use it, we could not keep it. If it would only continue to be stored in a box and take up space that we aren’t going to have, there was no reason to keep it.

No matter what it was.

I kept repeating to myself that’s it’s all just stuff and if we don’t have an actual use for it we don’t need to keep it. Which led to some brutal decisions and emotional moments.

Curtis spent a lot of time building with Lego when he was growing up and had 4 boxes of original Lego from the 80’s that we had been lugging with us every time we’ve moved, including when we moved across the country┬áfrom Connecticut to Utah. We’ve found somewhere to store them every time that we have moved, but this time we are moving into a much smaller apartment and just couldn’t figure out where we might have room to store them. Since they haven’t actually been used in years, after some discussion Curtis decided to go ahead and donate them. Which kind of broke my heart for him because I never expected him to decide to give them up.

We had already scanned all of our pictures, so all of our photo albums went in the trash. All of them, including our wedding albums. We never look at the physical pictures anyway, so it wasn’t all that hard of a decision, but I did feel kind of guilty about it. I’m just hoping that someone isn’t going to “rescue” them from the trash and try to return them to us. I felt like we should have included a note in the trash bag letting people know that they were thrown away on purpose because we made digital copies.

We took pictures of all of the things that we were not going to be able to keep so that it wasn’t like we were completely getting rid of them.

I kept one small doll that my great grandma made, but had to decide to donate a doll that my grandmother made and a doll that I helped my grandmother and aunt make because I simply will not have the space to store them.

I had to make the guilt inducing decision to throw away the cake topper that was used at both my wedding and my parent’s wedding because it was falling apart. The other cake topper that was used at our wedding, the utensils we used to cut our wedding cakes and the glasses that we used for the toasts at our wedding are all being donated.

All of our Halloween and Christmas decorations are being donated. I haven’t decorated in years and will have no space to store them. We took a picture of each individual decoration before sticking it in the donate pile.

All of my yarn and all of my beading supplies are being donated because they take up way too much space. Most of the artwork that we had done over the years that we were never likely to display anywhere again was gotten rid of or donated after we made absolutely that we got pictures of all of them.

There is a pile of stuff waiting to be donated in our garage that probably takes up about the same amount of floor space as the size of what our new living room will be. We have a picture of it, but it’s Curtis’ phone at work with him, so I can’t share it here.

It was a much more emotional project than I thought it would be, but overall I’m mostly just relieved to be getting rid of all of that stuff. We are much more likely to be able to fit in our new apartment now and the stuff that we are donating or that we trashed is all stuff that we will not have to pack into a moving truck. Which makes the thought of this move a lot less overwhelming.

Go Minimal

Posted in Childless by Choice, Mental Health, Stay at Home Wife

I really am doing okay, but…

I really am doing okay, but it’s not easy.

I am more stable now than I was when I was seeing doctors and was medicated, but anxiety, panic and depression are still things that I deal with daily.

I have learned how to manage them, but managing them means having strict control over my environment. Which is not always possible.

The way that I have structured my life to manage my disorders is not always respected or understood by others. I am judged for my choice to not work. That I am a stay at home wife, even though I do not have children. I am judged for the fact that I do not even like kids and therefore obviously have no interest in having children.

I am not a social person, but some people cannot understand or respect that. I am told that I would feel better if I got out and socialized more by people who have no idea what socializing takes out of me. Not only am I one hundred percent introvert, but I have extreme anxiety. I do enjoy going out and socializing every so often, but I always pay a price for it. Which is why I love messaging and texting people (in moderation), I am able to socialize but I am also able to still be alone at the same time.

Hang up and text

It’s not that I don’t love my friends, but I have to love myself more and take care of myself. I know that this might make me a terrible friend, but I am who I am. Even if I am medicated again at some point, the medication will never completely “fix” all the things that other people think are wrong with me.

I’m always going to be an introvert, sorrynotsorry.

There are days when I wake full of purpose and can easily get up and start my day, and there are days where I feel as though I am a prisoner to that purpose or that everything is pointless. There are some mornings when just the thought of my normal daily routine is overwhelming. Where the thought of having to decide what to wear that day is paralyzing. I fear that at some point things are going to get bad enough for long enough that I will have to be hospitalized again.

The fear of hospitalization is a crippling fear.

I am aware that paranoia and mild delusions are part of my life because of my bipolar disorder. Because I know that I am prone to these things I can try to keep them under control and label them for what they are. I do fear that one day I will not recognize my delusions for what they are, that my hold on reality will slip without me realizing it. I do hope that if that ever happens that I will be able to find help quickly and that my husband and I will be able to afford it.

It shouldn’t be that way, I shouldn’t be worried about being able to afford treatment if my mental health deteriorates. I may seek treatment again before it ever gets to that point, if it ever does, but unfortunately being able to pay for that treatment has to be a primary concern.

I am honestly also somewhat reluctant to seek treatment again because I am afraid to start taking medications again. Some of the times when I was at my worst was while I was trying to find the right combination of medications to stabilize me.

It was hell.

I know that things have probably come a long way in the over a decade since I last took medications, but I am afraid that medications will only upset what balance I have found instead of help me keep it. ┬áI do wish that I had a bit more control over my anxiety and panic, but I don’t want that at the expense of exacerbating my bipolar disorder.

Besides, I heard somewhere that some study found that people who are excessive worriers are more than likely creative geniuses.

I’m a creative genius, people. Deal with it.

Posted in Apartment Living, Health, Random, Relationships

Our December move is still not officially official…

Yesterday my husband was able to talk to the woman at the apartment complex office who is responsible for letting us know if our rental applications were accepted. The day before he had spoken to someone else at the office who said that everything looked like it came back okay, but that she wasn’t the one who normally dealt with the applications so we’d have to wait to talk to the person who did. Apparently everything that has come back looks good, but they are still waiting on confirmation of my husband’s employment and of our rental history. She said that she doesn’t anticipate any issues, but that she probably won’t have confirmation of those 2 things until the end of next week. My husband and I can’t wait that long before handing in our “Intent To Vacate” paperwork where we are currently living though, because if we did we would not be giving 60 days notice. So we will be handing in that paperwork in the next few days. At least the things that they still need confirmation on are the things that we are not at all worried about. I will feel much better once we’ve actually officially been accepted though.

I also keep telling myself that our last couple moving experiences are nowhere near typical. Usually when you put a deposit down on an apartment, that is the apartment that you actually move into. The next step in a normal moving process is not to be contacted by the apartment complex and told that particular apartment (and the next one, and the next one) is not actually going to be available for you to move into. I know that, but that doesn’t stop me from trying to tell myself not to become too attached to that particular apartment’s location. It would be amazing to be able to move into the apartment that we chose and not whatever they happen to have available when all other options fail. I really hope that this moving process actually proceeds as it should.

Go Minimal

In other news, as of Tuesday when I had my final 2 fillings done and my permanent onlay installed, all of my major dental work is now done. I am so relieved to have that behind me. The next step is for me to get braces of some sort once my gums are healthy enough and I have the funds to pay for them. Which will probably be once I am able to pay off the debt from all the work that I already had done. So it might be a while still.

Dentist Said I Needed a Crown

Also, tonight I will be going to a BBQ that my husband’s work is hosting at a local park for all the Team Leaders on his project. This will be the first social event that I have attended in a while and I’m surprised that I’m not really all that nervous about it. I am excited for the chance to be able to finally meet some of his coworkers, but me and social situations don’t usually mix well. We’ll see if my anxiety rears it’s head at the BBQ.

Having Plans

Posted in Apartment Living

Us moving in December is slightly more official now…

My husband contacted the apartment complex that we are planning on moving to a little while ago and was told that it looks like our applications were accepted. However, the woman who usually calls people back about things like this is out of the office, so we’ll probably have to wait until tomorrow before we get official confirmation of our applications having been accepted.

The unofficial confirmation has reduced the amount of worry I have about it though and I am feeling more confident that this will actually happen. We’re confident enough that my husband is going ahead and switching his vacation to the week that we are planning on moving.

After what happened last time we moved though, where we had 3 apartments fall through on us in rapid succession, I am not completely convinced yet that we will end up in the apartment that we put a deposit down on. I know that the likelihood of things going as wrong as they did last time is low, but having been burned before I have much less confidence in this process going as it should.

I would love it if the universe could restore my confidence in this process though and if my husband and I could have a fairly easy moving experience for once. Please?

Great Idea until packing